Thirty Minus Five Years Old

Thirty Minus Five Years Old

Whoohoo! Birthdays are the very best aren’t they? Well, they are, when you’re four years old, and you have a party the next day with all the cool kids you’ve invited and you know there’ll be cake and presents and party packs! Oh how fun birthdays were when we were younger.

Birthday Tangled

Well, those were simpler times. Now though, we have expectations and often times those expectations are not met. Also, now the thought of growing a year older isn’t as appealing as it was when we were younger. Because now, with age comes a whole lot of extra things that we don’t really want, but they’ll come anyway because well, they’re just like that.

So this year, I’m turning twenty five, whoop! And I’m not that petrified. Yes, I can no longer sing ‘I don’t know about you, but I’m turning twenty two’ and quite frankly, I couldn’t sing that song for the past two years, so I think I’ll manage haha. Because as wonderful as it was to have birthday parties at four years old, and even at twenty two, it’s so much better, in a whole new, exhilaratingly terrifying way when you get older.

Birthday Party

There’s something exciting about figuring out your life in your twenties, learning how to budget properly, saving religiously every month and making the tough choice between that adorable polka dot skirt, a Ken Follet book you haven’t read (I can’t believe there are so many) and then well, having food for the rest of the month. And let’s not even mention the love life situation. But with the stress of everyday life, comes a freedom that you smily do not have at four years old. You decide what it is you’re going to do about the condition of your life. After all, it’s just circumstantial, right? Most of the time, you think about your life and go hey, I’m here, this sucks, let’s order some cocktails shall we?!

Birthday Dean

Because at the end of the day, we will look back to these days and count them as the ‘simpler times’ and I don’t want to look back in regret and think that I should’ve enjoyed it more. I don’t want to think that I’ve wasted my twenties being a stick in the mud and not actually playing in the mud. I feel like I say this often, but it’s so important to enjoy where we are at the point we’re at in our lives. Yes, things could be better, but they could also be a hell of a lot worse. So even though I’m not over the moon excited for my birthday tomorrow, it is a big day (yay quarter century!) and I will sum up the courage to be excited about it.

Birthday Lily

We’re so used to having everything together, and when they’re not held together, we start to panic. But this is what life does though, the minute you think you’ve got it figured out, it comes and pulls the rug out from beneath your feet. And when you’re lying there, with your head on the ground and a pain in your butt , take a moment to appreciate what you have in your life. The people who stand beside you and support you and the fact that you’re better off than 70% of the world, is a pretty good thing to be thankful for 🙂

So yay to unconventional birthdays!

Love and The Anticipation of Calorie Free Birthday Cake,

Rochelle xx

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Bold is the New Black

Bold is the New Black

Be Brave

It’s Thursday! One of my all time favourite days in the week because it’s one day closer to the next day which brings us all one day closer to Christmas 🙂 Seriously, I’m not one to live for the weekend, but I do love me a good ol’ Thursday.

Anyway. Update on life and such,  I’ve been promoted! Yay! After my three month probation period I have been moved from reception to rentals (just one bar below management, which is part of the long term plan). So although it’s a lot more stress and longer hours, it is a lot more rewarding. It’s funny, because I was pretty bummed about being a receptionist… I was so bored and felt so under-valued. Before I knew it, I was moved to the rentals office to help out with the workload and then, bam! In the rentals office permanently! So yay. This is really great. Who knows, I might even be moving into my own place by sometime in next year 😉

Anyway, life is good at the moment and I want to make a note thereof. I also want to note the fact that life isn’t always a suck-fest. And yes, it is a suck-fest  a lot of the time, but there are moments which make the rest of it all come together 🙂 Haha, this is sounding like a lame tribute to ‘sticking out the hard times’ but it’s not!

I had a moment on the way home yesterday, when I thought briefly, about my childhood. It had it’s tough, wearing flip-flops in winter moments… and moments where I would wear hand me downs and try to wear it confidently, like someone stylish. I thought about the fact that if 10 year old me saw 24 year old me, 10 year old me would say ‘I want to be like that one day’. And that thought makes me smile. It makes me smile that I’m doing something with my life. It makes me smile that regardless of all that life has thrown in my face, I can walk about with my head high and be confident about where I am now.

I still have a long way to go, i.e. owning my own vehicle and living in my own apartment (which is soon on it’s way mind you) and then, of course we have the wanderlust I have boiling inside my bones every single day. So although I have a lot more I want to accomplish in my life, I’m well on my way to get there 🙂

It’s taken me a while to realize that it’s not the things you have in your life that matter in order to make you happy though. If you are driving the fastest car, or you have the most elaborate wardrobe, or even if you’ve traveled t o every continent. If you’re not happy despite all those things, neither of it actually matters. Yes, you can talk up a storm at a dinner party and your contribution to the ‘meeting the relatives of your other half’ will be a lot more interesting, but who are you underneath all those things? If you’re relying on those things to make up for a shitty personality then… Shame. And if you’ve accomplished all those things and have a stellar personality, then high fives all round to you friend!

It’s great to have a list of things being ticked off your list, but it matters nothing if those are the things you are counting on to fulfill you as a person. It sounds silly, but it happens. *Extreme vulnerability ahead* I often find myself feeling less worthy of someone’s attention or time when I think about the things I haven’t yet done in my life, like my lack of travels or my lack of a driver’s license. So I often measure myself to those things. Which, if you think about it logically, is rather stupid. I remember as a child, when I got my first cellphone, thinking that when I have one with games, I will be so much cooler… Then, when I had one with a colour screen… Then, when I had a flip phone… Then… then… then… Now, years later, I’m still doing that. I’m still waiting for my next  ‘when I have, I will be’. The truth is that I need to be first. I need to be confident where I am, with what I have before the rest of it all comes along.

It sucks the joy out f where you are currently if you’re constantly looking down on yourself and waiting for the next phase. Instead, enjoy the phase of your life that you’re in currently. It will make that phase flow a whole lot smoother 🙂

I think that’s all from me for now. Until next month! Haha

Love and jelly sprinkles,

Rochelle xx

Video

Recipe for a Miracle Part 1 | Jon Jorgenson – YouTube

You know how you always seem to hear the right thing at the right time, exactly when you need it? When you’re scrolling through your Facebook/Twitter/Instagram feed and someone posts an inspirational quote which feels as if it was posted specially for you? Well, watching this video made me feel this way.

It’s a short, seven minute sermon and it reaches deep (yo.). It’s incredible how God can give you exactly what you need at the exact time you need it 🙂

I’ve been feeling a bit lost lately, as if I’m floating from one task/assignment/deadline to the next and I’m barely managing. Until this weekend, when it all came tumbling down and I realised (with the help of my best friend) that I had lost my motivation. I lost the reason I had started studying in the first place. I lost the love of it, the thought of doing it to help people and have an amazing life worth living. I was so busy making sure everything was done and in order, making sure everyone else was happy and staying afloat, that I starting sinking. I forgot about God’s promises for my life, that He holds me and He is my comforter. I forgot that God can use me, exactly where I am and use the space that I’m in as preparation for what lies ahead.

This happens often though, it happens to each of us at some point or another and the turning point is when you get yourself together, cry it our and find your inspiration again. Take a step back and look at the bigger picture. Realise that your life, although performed by you, is not in your hands. You were created for a purpose greater than you could ever imagine 🙂

So even though it’s Monday and I started my day with decaff coffee (really guys, decaff?) I had an awesome gym session and therefore an awesome start to my day and week! I know I’ll have low moments again, but as long as I have a solid support system and a strong heart, I know that I have nothing to fear.

The Anima Series is incredible, be sure to check out some more of their videos 🙂

Love and a Happy Heart,

Rochelle Joy 🙂 xx

via Recipe for a Miracle Part 1 | Jon Jorgenson – YouTube.

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Having a Fear of Failure

Having a Fear of Failure

-This, is brilliant. This is not uncommon. More people experience this than we give them credit for. It’s such a big word and such a common feeling in people, I can’t believe it isn’t more simple.

It’s quite funny that I stumbled upon this ‘word of the day’ today, because it’s something that hits home, it hits home so hard I think I lost my breath for a moment when I saw it.

I’ve applied for UNISA (The University of South Africa) this year, to study Industrial & Organisational Psychology and I’ve been in the process of calling them and finding out about my courses and all that. I’ve called about 5 times, each time I was put in line, at one point I was 20th in line. Then this morning, I called literally 15 minutes after their offices opened and I was put 6th in line. Eventually I got through to an operator who l told me I’d be contacted before the end of the day. So yes, today is going to be an interesting battle-of-my-mind type of day.

What you need to know, is that I give the title ‘Doubting Thomas’ a whole new form. Not only because I’m female (haha) but because I find it very hard to believe in myself. I have the most faith in people and the government and the world as a whole, but when it comes to me, it’s just not happening. I’m working on it though (almost daily) so, usually any form of confidence I need to muster, come in the smallest drips and drabs.

When I saw this, I decided that I’m not going to put myself into a box. I’m not going to spend the entire day worrying about the outcome of today. Whether I get accepted or not, I’m going to pursue my dream. I’m going to walk in the path that God has laid out before me, because no matter the outcome, His will will prevail and it is so much greater that what I could ever imagine 🙂

It’s so simple typing these words, because it’s what’s in my heart. But, when the time comes for me to put them into action, that God-inspired self confidence I just wrote with, diminishes and I’m left on an island of self-pity and worthlessness before I realize that my island is in fact not an island at all, but an illusion of fear that makes me feel isolated and alone.

The thing that I need to remind myself of constantly though, is that I have no reason to fear 🙂 God has my back, He looks out for me like a dad who assists his child on her first bike ride. He smiles and cheers me on when I’ve ridden off without my training wheels, and if I lose my balance and fall he’s right there beside me to help me up and get me on my feet again 🙂

The thing to remember is that there are more people out there who feel this way. Who are fearful of not succeeding in life, who feel that they aren’t good enough. To all those people, there is hope! It’s an on-going journey to finding that you are good enough, that as long as you follow your heart, have faith in yourself and surround yourself with people who believe in and encourage you, you’ll be well on your way to great things darling 😉

Optimism

Optimism

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Alex and I have recently joined a new home group at our church and, last night the leader shared something that I found to be quite profound. He attended a summit recently and someone had said that comfort and courage cannot co-exist; the two are mutually exclusive. That got me thinking, what is that that I want in life? Do I want the safe, comfortable, not-too-high paying job that doesn’t challenge me? Or will I work hard, study and probably struggle for a while to pursue something greater?

The latter is definitely not the easier, but I think I would rather work hard, while I have a youthful energy and tenacity about life. I’m able to get by with 6 hours of sleep, for a few years. Rather that, over getting to the age of 40 and looking back with a heart filled with regret. Thank,s but no thanks.

I don’t think that we were created to live mediocre lives. I want my life to be worth something by the time I’m all wrinkled. I believe that we’re supposed to live purpose driven lives, lives filled with meaning and a passion for what we do daily. It’s quite scary to think that there are so many people who get up and sit behind a desk that inevitably kills them (O.K. not that the desk itself kills them, but you know, lack of ambition, leading to depression, failing immune system, stress, heart attack megh). I don’t want that for my life! Nobody should want that for their lives!

So, if there is something greater driving you, go after that. Don’t settle for comfort. You’ll have plenty of time to be comfortable in a lovely retirement village in Hermanus when you’re 90. For now, get up and get moving. We have the world at our fingertips (literally).

Be optimistic about your future! Don’t sit and wait for something to happen, make it happen! Create your own opportunities!

Go on, the world needs more optimistic, ambitious, courageous people! Be one of them 🙂

Some Insane Courage

Some Insane Courage

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– I don’t know about you, but I often shy away from people or situations that make me feel uncomfortable. It’s easier to stand in the corner on your own than to go up to some random stranger and start a conversation. Even closer to home,

at the gym; it’s so much more convenient to go to the equipment that you’re familiar with instead of branching out and trying some new machine that works your outer thighs 😀

I’ve tried this lately. I’m an introvert, sometimes I actually hate people. I love all people, but sometimes, just sometimes I feel like Dwight at Phyllis’ wedding thinking that there are too many people in the world and that we need a new plague… Ha

When that horrid moment comes that you have to step out of your comfort zone, remember this quote from one of the cutest movies you’ll ever watch (I love that little girl, OMG she’s so cute).rsh, but sometimes I feel that way too. The reality is that one cannot continue living with that mindset. You get to a point in your life where you’re forced to branch out, you’re forced to meet new people and to make new friends. That’s just how life works.

20 seconds is all you’ll need. Take a deep breath, swallow and step out. Even if you crash and burn and end up making an awkward Hitler joke, at least you know that you tried something new. Self five for being brave 😀 I’ve done this myself and it takes a while before you actually don’t have to force yourself to do it. You feel so much better for being interactive and you gain confidence along the way 🙂 Two birds bro!

Let your light shine by being true to who you are and sharing that with the world. A light is of no use of it’s hidden under a bushel 🙂

xx Rochelle